Sex.
(I bet we just caught your attention!)
How do you relate to sex and intimacy in your marriage? Do you and your spouse delight in God’s beautiful plan for physical and emotional connection through sex and share on a deeper level? Or perhaps it’s viewed less as a loving and attached experience and more as a chore – attended to begrudgingly and, unfortunately – without enjoyment.
God’s intention toward marriage and sex is evident, going all the way back to the very first book of the Bible. Genesis 2:24 (ESV) reads: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” That paints quite a clear picture regarding the inclusion of intimacy with sex. “...hold fast to his wife” and “.. they shall become one flesh.” It’s as if husband and wife, through closeness and affection, unite into one person.
Song of Songs (or Song of Solomon) is another beautiful example of intimate and connected love, expressed physically between a husband and wife. The relationship’s vision of intimacy and physical passion leaps off the pages; it’s a sexual marriage relationship straight from the heart of God.
But – it doesn’t always turn out that way. When unresolved or painful issues step into the bedroom, intimacy can be cut off, leaving one – or both – partners feeling anything but ‘one.’ Or it may be that you grew up in a home where sex was a taboo subject; therefore thoughts were shaped around the topic of sex long before you could participate or even knew what to ask. Either way, emotional disconnect from your partner can leave much to desire in the arena of sex and intimacy, and the barriers are not always simple to overcome.
The good news is that with intentional effort, intimacy can return. Of course, it will require care, keeping God at the center, placing your spouse’s needs above your own, and seeking outside help if needed. But, it is possible to regain that intimate friendship and physical connection with your spouse. The place that is sacred to only your marriage.
When we live out sex and intimacy according to God’s plan, we honor His marriage design. And we reap the benefits of a stronger and more connected physical and emotional relationship with our spouse.
Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled. Hebrews 13:4, (ESV)
If you’re struggling with this or any other area, in your marriage, Tim and I would love to come alongside you to coach you to a vibrant, fulfilling relationship.